what's the next step?

most of my life has been spent yearning for tomorrow.

when i get my license...

when i graduate...

when i move out on my own...

when i get married...

when i have my own kids...

when i'm old and gray... well, maybe not this one yet.  :-)

recently a friend envisioned a picture of what this looks like and described an accurate portrayal of my recent journey.  God is a lamp that i'm holding along this dark path and it only illuminates one or two steps beyond me.  i'm straining to see so far beyond the light that i lose sight of what God already is showing me.  the end destination (the hopes of tomorrow) seem so distant and impossible because i can't see them.  in reality they may only be three steps away.

this last weekend, pastor jason spoke about how miracles sometimes hide in the process of obedience.  he explained the concept by using Jesus' first miracle as an example (john 2:1-11).  Jesus asked the servants to fill the six stone water jars which held a grand total of 120-180 gallons!  i had never really thought about how time consuming and challenging that might have been.  the servants had to go to the water source, fill a container, bring it back, dump it in and repeat.  when did the miracle happen?  was it the first drop that fell into the water jar?  was it the 100th bucket full?  all we know is that it happened sometime between the first step of obedience and the little sip that impressed the master of the banquet.

instead of focusing on what is just out of reach, i am learning to live joyfully in the moment and anticipating the next step God is calling me to take. 

"the only influence you have on the future are the seeds that you sow today."

Clive Pick

what's the next step?

most of my life has been spent yearning for tomorrow.

when i get my license...

when i graduate...

when i move out on my own...

when i get married...

when i have my own kids...

when i'm old and gray... well, maybe not this one yet.  :-)

recently a friend envisioned a picture of what this looks like and described an accurate portrayal of my recent journey.  God is a lamp that i'm holding along this dark path and it only illuminates one or two steps beyond me.  i'm straining to see so far beyond the light that i lose sight of what God already is showing me.  the end destination (the hopes of tomorrow) seem so distant and impossible because i can't see them.  in reality they may only be three steps away.

this last weekend, pastor jason spoke about how miracles sometimes hide in the process of obedience.  he explained the concept by using Jesus' first miracle as an example (john 2:1-11).  Jesus asked the servants to fill the six stone water jars which held a grand total of 120-180 gallons!  i had never really thought about how time consuming and challenging that might have been.  the servants had to go to the water source, fill a container, bring it back, dump it in and repeat.  when did the miracle happen?  was it the first drop that fell into the water jar?  was it the 100th bucket full?  all we know is that it happened sometime between the first step of obedience and the little sip that impressed the master of the banquet.

instead of focusing on what is just out of reach, i am learning to live joyfully in the moment and anticipating the next step God is calling me to take. 

"the only influence you have on the future are the seeds that you sow today."

Clive Pick

triple the fun!

 

this last week has been PACKED to the brim with car stuff, hanging out with the kids and church.   you had better believe that i'm taking advantage of every bit of sunshine and blue skies that this week has blessed me with.

the kids and i ventured out to salish ponds on monday and had such an amazing time.  (thank you alexis for showing me that area!)  we walked, threw rocks into the lake and played with a fuzzy catapillar that meshach found.  i will miss these outside adventures when the rain comes...we will have to come up with new exciting things to do!

triple the fun!

 

this last week has been PACKED to the brim with car stuff, hanging out with the kids and church.   you had better believe that i'm taking advantage of every bit of sunshine and blue skies that this week has blessed me with.

the kids and i ventured out to salish ponds on monday and had such an amazing time.  (thank you alexis for showing me that area!)  we walked, threw rocks into the lake and played with a fuzzy catapillar that meshach found.  i will miss these outside adventures when the rain comes...we will have to come up with new exciting things to do!

psalm 37:3-6

Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land and feed surely on His faithfulness, and truly you shall be fed.  Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.  Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.  And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as [the shining sun of] the noonday.

psalm 37:3-6 (amplified version)

psalm 37:3-6

Trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) in the Lord and do good; so shall you dwell in the land and feed surely on His faithfulness, and truly you shall be fed.  Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart.  Commit your way to the Lord [roll and repose each care of your load on Him]; trust (lean on, rely on, and be confident) also in Him and He will bring it to pass.  And He will make your uprightness and right standing with God go forth as the light, and your justice and right as [the shining sun of] the noonday.

psalm 37:3-6 (amplified version)

*talia nicole*

 

guess what?  i talked to someone who lives in paris today!  it was so fun to update mrs. talia sanders on the events of the last week.  i've been thinking about her so much lately.  it was fun that she would call on friend friday!

crazy.  exciting.  blessed.  i miss that girl like crazy!  she is the one who taught me how to swing dance and is definitely my favorite dance partner so far.  :o)   words cannot express how much fun we can have in any situation.  life is always an adventure.  whether we are just hanging out in fred meyers (because it was the only thing open -- good ole albany...), getting stuck underground in the french metro system, skydiving, talking for hours on the phone, or just doing nothing,  there is no one else who i'd rather be with.

distance, time zones and little obstacles may try to come between us, but it won't work.

friends for life.  love you tal!

*talia nicole*

 

guess what?  i talked to someone who lives in paris today!  it was so fun to update mrs. talia sanders on the events of the last week.  i've been thinking about her so much lately.  it was fun that she would call on friend friday!

crazy.  exciting.  blessed.  i miss that girl like crazy!  she is the one who taught me how to swing dance and is definitely my favorite dance partner so far.  :o)   words cannot express how much fun we can have in any situation.  life is always an adventure.  whether we are just hanging out in fred meyers (because it was the only thing open -- good ole albany...), getting stuck underground in the french metro system, skydiving, talking for hours on the phone, or just doing nothing,  there is no one else who i'd rather be with.

distance, time zones and little obstacles may try to come between us, but it won't work.

friends for life.  love you tal!

dreams come true...

 

yesterday, i got my dream car!!!  this last week, i've had the privilege of having a front row seat to watch how God provides and blesses situations.

sometime in high school i fell in love with mazda miatas.  however i didn't really see myself ever owning one.  not very practical for families and i had figured i'd be married within a few years of graduating.  yeah...still waiting for that.  :o)

my trusty car (lance), the green camry, had proved to be a reliable car but had several things that needed to be fixed.  instead of getting them fixed, i decided that i would much rather get a different car....to be specific, a miata.  so for the last couple weeks (with an immeasurable amount of help from my friend dave) the search was on!  it was decided that i'd see how much i would get for lance.  the fun began on saturday.  i honestly thought that this process could drag for several weeks if not months, but here is the actual timeline...

saturday ~ parked my car with for sale signs.  one offer.

sunday ~ person called back with higher offer.  i decided to take a leap and sell my car before making a purchase.  going to borrow my brother's car (stick shift...)

monday ~  $$$ exchanged for lance.  looked at a miata, saw potential, dave talked them down $1000!  started to learn how to drive stick shift.  people madly gesture at me for my poor skills.  i laughed.

tuesday ~ decision time.  i want to buy the miata.  dave set appointment for mechanic check.

wednesday ~ mechanic check.  drove away with the top down!  and then stalled it repeatedly...  :o)

i am so blessed.  blessed with a miata.  blessed by all the time and effort dave put into this.  blessed by my family who has supported my decisions and helped in any way that they could.  blessed by God, who loves and cherishes me more than i could ever imagine.

dreams come true...

 

yesterday, i got my dream car!!!  this last week, i've had the privilege of having a front row seat to watch how God provides and blesses situations.

sometime in high school i fell in love with mazda miatas.  however i didn't really see myself ever owning one.  not very practical for families and i had figured i'd be married within a few years of graduating.  yeah...still waiting for that.  :o)

my trusty car (lance), the green camry, had proved to be a reliable car but had several things that needed to be fixed.  instead of getting them fixed, i decided that i would much rather get a different car....to be specific, a miata.  so for the last couple weeks (with an immeasurable amount of help from my friend dave) the search was on!  it was decided that i'd see how much i would get for lance.  the fun began on saturday.  i honestly thought that this process could drag for several weeks if not months, but here is the actual timeline...

saturday ~ parked my car with for sale signs.  one offer.

sunday ~ person called back with higher offer.  i decided to take a leap and sell my car before making a purchase.  going to borrow my brother's car (stick shift...)

monday ~  $$$ exchanged for lance.  looked at a miata, saw potential, dave talked them down $1000!  started to learn how to drive stick shift.  people madly gesture at me for my poor skills.  i laughed.

tuesday ~ decision time.  i want to buy the miata.  dave set appointment for mechanic check.

wednesday ~ mechanic check.  drove away with the top down!  and then stalled it repeatedly...  :o)

i am so blessed.  blessed with a miata.  blessed by all the time and effort dave put into this.  blessed by my family who has supported my decisions and helped in any way that they could.  blessed by God, who loves and cherishes me more than i could ever imagine.

dreaming of a car & loan nightmares

yesterday i found a car that i fell in love with!  normally i don't have quite that reaction when looking at cars and needless to say, i'm praying that this car would miraculously be mine.  :o)

just recently the decision was made to purchase a car instead of dealing with the problems i have with my current one.  i would rather have a different car than put more money into my camry.  i thought it would be a simple process...find a car, fall in love, get a loan (for whatever amount i needed), buy the car, sell my car, live happily ever after.  ummmm...yeah.

yesterday's process led me to the bank and gave me a reality check in the world of loans.  i've never had a loan before and figure that all i needed to do is tell them how much i needed, fill out some paperwork and possibly get someone to co-sign.  yep...i had no clue. 

last night i racked my brain for alternative ideas or other ways to make this deal work.  no such luck.  did i mention someone else was going to look at the car this morning?  talk about pressure.

at this point, the situation hasn't changed.  BUT miracles can happen.  it's an interesting dynamic to be in...knowing God can make it happen, knowing that He knows the best steps to take and how they will really effect my life, knowing that i want the car and knowing that it may not be the right time/car/price.  we will see what will happen...

dreaming of a car & loan nightmares

yesterday i found a car that i fell in love with!  normally i don't have quite that reaction when looking at cars and needless to say, i'm praying that this car would miraculously be mine.  :o)

just recently the decision was made to purchase a car instead of dealing with the problems i have with my current one.  i would rather have a different car than put more money into my camry.  i thought it would be a simple process...find a car, fall in love, get a loan (for whatever amount i needed), buy the car, sell my car, live happily ever after.  ummmm...yeah.

yesterday's process led me to the bank and gave me a reality check in the world of loans.  i've never had a loan before and figure that all i needed to do is tell them how much i needed, fill out some paperwork and possibly get someone to co-sign.  yep...i had no clue. 

last night i racked my brain for alternative ideas or other ways to make this deal work.  no such luck.  did i mention someone else was going to look at the car this morning?  talk about pressure.

at this point, the situation hasn't changed.  BUT miracles can happen.  it's an interesting dynamic to be in...knowing God can make it happen, knowing that He knows the best steps to take and how they will really effect my life, knowing that i want the car and knowing that it may not be the right time/car/price.  we will see what will happen...

*jodi*

this is my friend jodi.  today's friend friday is showcasing this beauty who lives too far away in my opinion.  :o)  we met through a mutual friend and although we haven't had the opportunity to ever live in the same state, i treasure the times we've had together.

i appreciate the laughter and times of prayer.  i love her heart for God and the people around her.  i adore her joyful silliness.  my nephews and niece fell in love too.

jodi ~ thank you for being you!

*jodi*

this is my friend jodi.  today's friend friday is showcasing this beauty who lives too far away in my opinion.  :o)  we met through a mutual friend and although we haven't had the opportunity to ever live in the same state, i treasure the times we've had together.

i appreciate the laughter and times of prayer.  i love her heart for God and the people around her.  i adore her joyful silliness.  my nephews and niece fell in love too.

jodi ~ thank you for being you!

angel's rest with natalie

this is my fourth time hiking angel's rest this year.  :o)  can you tell it's my favorite hike right now?

natalie and i set out last week ready for an adventure.  we drove along the scenic highway and were eager to get hiking.  i love stopping along the trail to catch my breath to take in the beauty that surrounds you as trek the 2.6 miles up the mountain.

the one thing that struck me this time was how much the river had noticeably changed.  the top two pictures were taken last week and the last one was taken in february.  i wonder how much water covered that little island earlier in the year.

p.s.  i look taller than natalie! (we were sitting down on a log)  that's a first...

angel's rest with natalie

this is my fourth time hiking angel's rest this year.  :o)  can you tell it's my favorite hike right now?

natalie and i set out last week ready for an adventure.  we drove along the scenic highway and were eager to get hiking.  i love stopping along the trail to catch my breath to take in the beauty that surrounds you as trek the 2.6 miles up the mountain.

the one thing that struck me this time was how much the river had noticeably changed.  the top two pictures were taken last week and the last one was taken in february.  i wonder how much water covered that little island earlier in the year.

p.s.  i look taller than natalie! (we were sitting down on a log)  that's a first...

azariah & yogurt

azariah wanted to drink his yogurt today and after a few minutes of messy communications, i understood.  i diluted it a little with milk and gave him a straw.  he LOVED it!  definitely made me smile...

azariah & yogurt

azariah wanted to drink his yogurt today and after a few minutes of messy communications, i understood.  i diluted it a little with milk and gave him a straw.  he LOVED it!  definitely made me smile...

exodus 9:16

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in ALL the earth. 

Exodus 9:16

exodus 9:16

But I have raised you up for this very purpose, that I might show you my power and that my name might be proclaimed in ALL the earth. 

Exodus 9:16

my dream

these are my favorites this month so far of the kiddos that are growing up so fast!

yesterday was a struggle for me.  while in the church nursery, a baby that hadn't been in there for a while came back and re-stole my heart.  he is now a toddler and though i try not to have favorites, his joy and piercing blue eyes stand out.  driving home, my mind flew through scenarios that would allow me to babysit or even adopt the little guy.  at the heart of the issue...i am dreaming of the day i have my own little ones to love and chase around.

last night God and i had a little chat about it and i was reminded how blessed i am.   not only in my future, but today.  i get to love my nephews and niece and get paid for it.  i have the privilege of blessing parents and their little ones at church.  i have friends that love to have breaks from their little blessings.

i'm living my dream.

my dream

these are my favorites this month so far of the kiddos that are growing up so fast!

yesterday was a struggle for me.  while in the church nursery, a baby that hadn't been in there for a while came back and re-stole my heart.  he is now a toddler and though i try not to have favorites, his joy and piercing blue eyes stand out.  driving home, my mind flew through scenarios that would allow me to babysit or even adopt the little guy.  at the heart of the issue...i am dreaming of the day i have my own little ones to love and chase around.

last night God and i had a little chat about it and i was reminded how blessed i am.   not only in my future, but today.  i get to love my nephews and niece and get paid for it.  i have the privilege of blessing parents and their little ones at church.  i have friends that love to have breaks from their little blessings.

i'm living my dream.

yeah yeah!

seriously loving the new blog look!  how long will it last...who knows.  :o)

yeah yeah!

seriously loving the new blog look!  how long will it last...who knows.  :o)

google maps vs. God

i love google maps!  i feel secure knowing when i'm supposed to turn, what streets to look for and where i am going.  the other night, while driving my friend home, i was confronted with a different approach.  she preferred to tell me as we were going...revealing one step at a time and waiting until i needed to act to tell me.

to be brutally honest, it really frustated me.  i could possibly blame it on being tired and grumpy, but that wouldn't be entirely true.  while restling with the emotions behind wanting to be in "control" of the situation, God spoke softly to me.

i am a organized controlling person.  for most of my life, i have been in denial about it.  don't get me wrong, i usually don't try to micro-manage other people's lives...just my own.  lists, schedules and logical timelines are my constant companions.  well, God doesn't play by my rules or fit into the box that i've tried so hard to shove Him in.

the theme of my life lately has been let go!  God wants me to release all of the things that i try desperately to do by myself.  i strive to be one step ahead, prepared for anything, and aware of the final destination and all the little details along the way.  BUT that is not how God has called me to live.  He has called me to live an extraordinary life full of adventure.

tomorrow's unknowns are daunting.  my future hopes and dreams often morph and change.  questions about life are sometimes unanswerable.  the big picture is overwhelming.  God wants me to take one step.  i can do that...all the while trusting that He knows where we will be fifty steps from now.

google maps vs. God

i love google maps!  i feel secure knowing when i'm supposed to turn, what streets to look for and where i am going.  the other night, while driving my friend home, i was confronted with a different approach.  she preferred to tell me as we were going...revealing one step at a time and waiting until i needed to act to tell me.

to be brutally honest, it really frustated me.  i could possibly blame it on being tired and grumpy, but that wouldn't be entirely true.  while restling with the emotions behind wanting to be in "control" of the situation, God spoke softly to me.

i am a organized controlling person.  for most of my life, i have been in denial about it.  don't get me wrong, i usually don't try to micro-manage other people's lives...just my own.  lists, schedules and logical timelines are my constant companions.  well, God doesn't play by my rules or fit into the box that i've tried so hard to shove Him in.

the theme of my life lately has been let go!  God wants me to release all of the things that i try desperately to do by myself.  i strive to be one step ahead, prepared for anything, and aware of the final destination and all the little details along the way.  BUT that is not how God has called me to live.  He has called me to live an extraordinary life full of adventure.

tomorrow's unknowns are daunting.  my future hopes and dreams often morph and change.  questions about life are sometimes unanswerable.  the big picture is overwhelming.  God wants me to take one step.  i can do that...all the while trusting that He knows where we will be fifty steps from now.

and the winner is...

KATELYN!

sweet. now to figure out when to hand-deliver the scarf and you'll be all set for fall. :o)

and the winner is...

KATELYN!

sweet. now to figure out when to hand-deliver the scarf and you'll be all set for fall. :o)

*jenise*

i was SO close to forgetting about friend friday! i can't believe it's already been another week.

this picture of jenise and i was taken in poland. while we had met each other before this point, this was the first time we really hung out for any length of time. can i just say that i'm so BLESSED to know her? it's been almost a year now since this pic was taken and i've been blown away by how God has intentionally weaved our lives together. her contagious laugh and willingness to serve have encouraged me so frequently. as we journey though life's ups and downs i know without a doubt that she will understand and walk with me in faith. jenise...thank you.

*jenise*

i was SO close to forgetting about friend friday! i can't believe it's already been another week.

this picture of jenise and i was taken in poland. while we had met each other before this point, this was the first time we really hung out for any length of time. can i just say that i'm so BLESSED to know her? it's been almost a year now since this pic was taken and i've been blown away by how God has intentionally weaved our lives together. her contagious laugh and willingness to serve have encouraged me so frequently. as we journey though life's ups and downs i know without a doubt that she will understand and walk with me in faith. jenise...thank you.

anyone want a scarf?

are you ready for my first blog give away? i am! to get ready for the fast approaching fall, i crocheted (weird word) a scarf out of a beautiful blue yarn. one of my favorite colors...

anyways, here's the deal. the deadline is saturday, september 12th at midnight. i will go to an online random number generator (www.random.org) next sunday and it will choose the lucky winner! you may leave one comment for each of the following:

1. i follow your blog! (tell the truth...)
2. i found raw grace through ___ and i love it when you blog about ___!
   
3. i posted a blog about your blog!
4. my all-time favorite blog is ___.
   

good luck! can't wait to read all the comments! (comments make me happy)

anyone want a scarf?

are you ready for my first blog give away? i am! to get ready for the fast approaching fall, i crocheted (weird word) a scarf out of a beautiful blue yarn. one of my favorite colors...

anyways, here's the deal. the deadline is saturday, september 12th at midnight. i will go to an online random number generator (www.random.org) next sunday and it will choose the lucky winner! you may leave one comment for each of the following:

1. i follow your blog! (tell the truth...)
2. i found raw grace through ___ and i love it when you blog about ___!
   
3. i posted a blog about your blog!
4. my all-time favorite blog is ___.
   

good luck! can't wait to read all the comments! (comments make me happy)

*natalie alexis*

today i'm starting a friday tradition that hopefully will last for more than a couple of weeks. :o) friend friday! every friday, i will highlight a different friend who means SO much to me. so to start it off we have natalie alexis!

natalie and i met probably around 1999ish (not quite sure...). as i became friends with talia, i would be over at her house and would sometimes see her younger sister. it's interesting to me that we didn't become friends earlier, but i do remember that even two years difference seemed like SO much back in the day...she was, after all, still in middle school and i was in high school. the summer of 2007 we really hit it off. natalie, talia and i were the cool kids of condo 1716 in gresham and the three of us grew close. i loved getting to know her better and was so inspired by her faith, joy and creativity. this week i get to hang out with her for a couple days, and i'm beyond thrilled. she will soon be off on another adventure and i can't wait to see what God will be doing in and through her life in this next season.

beautiful natalie, i love ya!

*natalie alexis*

today i'm starting a friday tradition that hopefully will last for more than a couple of weeks. :o) friend friday! every friday, i will highlight a different friend who means SO much to me. so to start it off we have natalie alexis!

natalie and i met probably around 1999ish (not quite sure...). as i became friends with talia, i would be over at her house and would sometimes see her younger sister. it's interesting to me that we didn't become friends earlier, but i do remember that even two years difference seemed like SO much back in the day...she was, after all, still in middle school and i was in high school. the summer of 2007 we really hit it off. natalie, talia and i were the cool kids of condo 1716 in gresham and the three of us grew close. i loved getting to know her better and was so inspired by her faith, joy and creativity. this week i get to hang out with her for a couple days, and i'm beyond thrilled. she will soon be off on another adventure and i can't wait to see what God will be doing in and through her life in this next season.

beautiful natalie, i love ya!

building pressure & altered focus

i desire security. i would love for my bank account to have X amount of money in it. i wish that my car was like the energizer bunny and kept going and going and never quit. i want my future plans to at least have a tentative blueprint. above all, i want my heart to be fully abandoned to God.

the uncertainties of life are mounting. questions buzzing in my head are making the pressure rise. there are things that i don't even want to think about, let alone deal with. i'm slowly learning that God has me in this place to help me realize the truth.

find rest, o my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. he alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, i will not be shaken. my salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. trust in him at all times, o people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

~psalm 62:5-8~

thankfully God is helping me with my focus. things i'm thankful for are being divinely highlighted and people who need encouragement have been strategically placed in my path. as i seek God's truth to share with others, i am being blessed.

i guess irratating pressure isn't always bad. especially if you like pearls.

building pressure & altered focus

i desire security. i would love for my bank account to have X amount of money in it. i wish that my car was like the energizer bunny and kept going and going and never quit. i want my future plans to at least have a tentative blueprint. above all, i want my heart to be fully abandoned to God.

the uncertainties of life are mounting. questions buzzing in my head are making the pressure rise. there are things that i don't even want to think about, let alone deal with. i'm slowly learning that God has me in this place to help me realize the truth.

find rest, o my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. he alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, i will not be shaken. my salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. trust in him at all times, o people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.

~psalm 62:5-8~

thankfully God is helping me with my focus. things i'm thankful for are being divinely highlighted and people who need encouragement have been strategically placed in my path. as i seek God's truth to share with others, i am being blessed.

i guess irratating pressure isn't always bad. especially if you like pearls.

paper bag puppets: phase 2

azariah's zebra turned out cute! he liked having it on his arm (for short periods of time...)

mari wasn't sure about putting her pig puppet on her arm. she wanted to look at it and study it.

meshach's bald eagle turned out to be my favorite. one of the first things he asked this morning is if i had brought the glue. he is so proud of his puppet.

shortly after meeting the toddlers, ms. pig and mr. zebra had limbs amputated and were quite beaten up. poor puppets...never had a chance.

paper bag puppets: phase 2

azariah's zebra turned out cute! he liked having it on his arm (for short periods of time...)

mari wasn't sure about putting her pig puppet on her arm. she wanted to look at it and study it.

meshach's bald eagle turned out to be my favorite. one of the first things he asked this morning is if i had brought the glue. he is so proud of his puppet.

shortly after meeting the toddlers, ms. pig and mr. zebra had limbs amputated and were quite beaten up. poor puppets...never had a chance.